I surround myself with people who complement me, not those who simply compliment me!

Yesterday, I went to a dulcimer workshop in a little town, near Jackson, Mississippi, nearly a hundred miles from my home. Now, talk about things that MAKE ME HAPPY!!! Playing the dulcimer and hanging out with other musicians who love music and play for the simple joy of sharing that love absolutely fills me with joy! (Dulcimers and musicians will have to be saved for blogs some other day, though. I don't have the time to go into all those wonderful moments.)

These are called
Mountain Dulcimers or Lap Dulcimers. They are
lovely, handcrafted instruments with a beautifully haunting sound.

Since we had to drive nearly half-way across our state, two of our neighboring Dulcimer Groups chose to car pool and "convoy" up there. We had so much fun during the drive up there and back that my ribs are still aching from laughing so much and so hard! (On the way home, we all agreed that we need to do road trips much more often!)

Even normal gas stations can be Beautiful!
If you notice, most businesses have beautiful landscaping and lovely flowers.
You just have to SEE the beauty surrounding you every moment in every day!

 Anyway, yesterday morning, during the ride to the Workshop, I noticed how much one of our married couples complement one another. (***Note - Compl-E-ment, not compl-I-ment.... Although they do compliment each other at times, they complement each other all the time!).

Definition of Compliment and Complement:

• Compliment - with an I -an expression of esteem, respect, affection or admiration 

                      (Words)

• Complement - with an E - something that fills up, completes, or makes perfect

                   (Actions)
                   (Completes or Makes Perfect! WOW!)
                  
This particular couple truly works together as a team; they COMPLETE one another! If one has a weakness in some area, the other fills in. For example, when HE began to have severe neck pain, SHE began turning HER head to inform him what was going on behind him! When SHE decided to play the Hammered Dulcimer, which is very heavy, HE began carrying it for her. When HE offers to teach a certain technique on the dulcimer, SHE copies the music and charts, brings them to the meeting, and hands them out at the right time. When SHE runs out of iced tea, HE refills her glass. When HE is called away to work during dulcimer class time, SHE takes over the teaching for that day. The most important part of this teamwork is that they don't have to ask for help. They watch each other and give help freely, without a grudge and without being asked! This complementing isn't limited to weaknesses. It also includes supporting each other's strengths and interests. When playing songs on the mountain dulcimer, HE loves doing extra riffs and runs, so SHE provides the solid, basic song, keeping the beat and allowing him the freedom to creatively express himself. I could list hundreds of examples, but I'm sure you get the idea. They work so well together that their names almost always come out as one word. It's hard to even think of one without the other, sort of like Bonnie and Clyde!

 

 

Since I had complementing on my mind, I started thinking about other friends and their spouses and how they interact. I quickly realized that my  high school friends who married someone who complements them are still together, even 30 years later! Those supportive actions seem to have allowed them to grow closer together over the years. However, those who fell for someone who simply complimented them (flattering words without supporting actions) didn't stay married for long. Actions definitely speak louder than words!!!

 

I looked around at my friends in the van, and I realized that the positive effects of people who complement each other aren't limited to married couples. Most of the people that I choose to spend time with complement me in some way. I feel better when I'm around these supportive people. I enjoy spending time with them and after I've spent time around them, I leave feeling better about myself than I did before I saw them. Complementary friendships definitely make me "happy."

Thunderstorms, Wind, Rain and Negative Ions

Wow! We're in the middle of another awe-inspiring display of Mother Nature's Power... a thunderstorm! I simply LOVE thunderstorms! That's probably a good thing, since we have them nearly daily during the Dog Days of Summer here in South Mississippi.

I usually sit on our porch and enjoy the cool wind, watching the rain drumming down. I stay relatively protected under our big, southern style porch, until the lightening gets too close (like now) or until the wind blows too much of the side-ways rain under the porch and I get a chill and have to come inside to dry off and warm up. During and after a thunderstorm, everything seems so much brighter and clearer and I seem to wake up and really feel alive!

During the past 30 years, I have tried to re-create that wonderful feeling by videoing the thunderstorms, but watching them later just isn't the same. Several years ago, I Googled "thunderstorm "and "feeling good" and found so many articles connecting thunderstorms and elevated mood.... and the little secret connection was negative ions, however, I really didn't think about these negative ions much.

Then, a couple of years ago, I returned to Niagara Falls. I suddenly remembered that I always feel so GOOD while at Niagara! I could breathe better and walk farther with less pain. The colors of the fall foliage seemed brighter and the water looked prettier than it had looked in all the other equally beautiful states that we had visited! It was like I was taking some sort of "happy" drug!

 

I stored these memories of near euphoria, and decided to investigate more after our vacation. After we came home, I Googled "Niagara Falls" and "feeling really good" and once again, I came across hundreds of articles about negative ions. So I decided I really needed to learn about these magical atoms and molecules!

Now, I've always thought of positive things as increasing moods, but evidently NEGATIVE ions are the mood boosters in nature. Basically, certain environments in nature create loads of negative ions; mountains, waterfalls, beaches, and, in South Mississippi, ... thunderstorms! These ions are tiny. They can not be smelled or tasted, but we breathe them in and they get into our bloodstream, just like oxygen. Once these negative ions are in our system, they are believed to bind with other chemicals in our bodies to create serotonin, our very own, natural chemical mood booster! An increase in serotonin can help us feel better, diminish depression, lower our stress levels and even gives us more energy!


Click here for a link for an article on WebMD concerning negative ions and positive moods: http://www.webmd.com/balance/features/negative-ions-create-positive-vibes?page=2


This makes sense to me. I was raised right on a rolling river. I've always preferred being near moving water. It is possible that my body is used to being exposed to these elevated levels of negative ions and maybe my body needs them to function correctly. I have always preferred being outdoors, even when it's hot and humid... and especially during and after a thunderstorm! Sitting at a computer makes me feel bad, so I distance myself from electronics. I even use blue-tooth enabled keyboard and mouse so I can stay far away from my computer!!!!

I read that most cities have very low negative ions, and I really, really dislike being in large cities. That also makes sense. After reading more about these negative ions, I've realized that many of my routines and habits fit right in with what the articles say about negative ions, which really helps me believe what many of these studies show.

Since I currently live several miles from any normal, natural negative ion generator, such as a river or waterfall, the thunderstorms seem to be my biggest mood boosters! So for now, I'll keep enjoying the storms every evening, while sitting on my front porch, soaking up all those mood-boosting, negative ions!